The Morning Star luminous, solitary, misunderstood, transcendent

For Those Who Wandered Here

The world sucks—or at least, it can suck.
As time went on, I realised in my journey that what I missed the most were the dynamics forged through interactions with others.

Some of these interactions were long-lasting, like my friends from childhood, whom I still speak to on a near-daily basis.
Others were fleeting—people who stopped by, shared a few stories, then continued on in their adventure.

In my own adventures, as time catches up to me—on all the rides I've done, all the walks I've stepped, the sights and sounds I've witnessed—I've seen many faces, their expressions, their surface-level stories.

But what if these people who pass me by also desire something they don’t have, or can’t have, or are too scared to have?

Unlike most people out there, I am a multidimensional individual who is not seeking just one or two things.
I am someone who can be one or more things to many different people—a multitude of possibilities with no hidden agenda, so long as you're upfront about your own intentions.

Are you a recluse who hungers to express your thoughts?
An extrovert surrounded by people who constantly misunderstand your flamboyancy?
An old soul no one listens to?
Someone with an eager young mind seeking more perspectives?
Society’s outlier who is sick of pretending just to stay relevant?

Here, I can be different things to different people.

• A listener, while you spill the weight of your journey.
• A mirror, when you need to practise words not yet ready for the world.
• A challenger, when your path needs questioning.
• An ally, when the way ahead feels too heavy to walk alone.
• Or simply a presence, when silence itself is the company you crave.

This can be fleeting, temporary, for a time—and perhaps, even a lifetime. Whatever works for you. I have no expectations.

Sometimes that means ranting until the fire burns low, or rehearsing the courage to ask someone out.
Sometimes it’s debating until we laugh at ourselves.
Sometimes it’s just sharing the stillness of a morning, watching the light shift across the walls.

We’ll always meet in the open first—on a bench along my ride, at a stone block in front of a school, or anywhere the world can still pass us by. If trust deepens, private spaces follow.

My home is small but alive: half lived-in comfort, half quiet workshop of memories.
The long couch waits under a string of Halloween lights.
The walls are heavy with photographs that catch fragments of time.
Two bikes lean nearby—one built for speed, one for distance—together holding nearly 32,000 kilometres of wonder and wear.
The air shifts cool when needed, and the hum of fast Wi-Fi keeps the world at bay—or brings it close, depending on what we choose.

I am not averse to any gender or identity.
What matters is mutual respect, and the understanding that even in disagreement, we can remain allies—perhaps even friends.

So if you’ve wandered here, rest a while.
When you leave, may your steps feel lighter than when you arrived.

And Thus...

I promise I will never fall in love with you without your permission.

I promise to never judge you—not for your past, your thoughts, your desires, nor your contradictions. My moral compass is layered, not linear—formed from experience, not fear of social backlash. It bends toward understanding, but not to cruelty, harm, or hollow virtue. I live in the grey, but I do not excuse the inexcusable.

I promise to respect your identity, your space, your rhythm, and never take more than you are willing to give.

I promise that silence, uncertainty, or retreat will never be met with guilt.

I promise that if you wish to leave, I will never chase you, but you will still leave with my kindness intact.

Beneath the Evening Star

I carry the energy of someone still chasing horizons, and the perspective of someone who’s been around long enough to know what counts.

I’m 46. Old enough to carry perspective. Young enough to keep moving. I also know age bias is real—too many rule themselves out before giving connection a chance. If your truest intent is to find someone you feel safe with, I ask only this: let yourself linger long enough to see past the number.

What I seek is not complicated—yet it’s rarer than most admit. Good company that doesn’t feel like performance. Laughter that lingers after the moment has passed. Conversations that stretch into the night and don’t run out of road. And above all, the liminal spaces—the in-between places, neither here nor there—where we realise it isn’t about where we’re going, but who we’re with along the way.

Sometimes I’m reminded of this when I take Rudi out at night. As we climb the stairs back to the apartment, I pause to look up—Venus often waiting, sometimes Luna beside her. In that quiet, beneath the evening star, I remember that what stays with me is not the years that pass, but the journeys travelled, the storms carried, and the stories spoken into the dark.

And since life isn’t only twilight and memory, here are some of the things that keep me entertained, distracted, and curious:

  • Movies: Blade Runner (both), Kingdom of Heaven, Ten to Chi to, Snow Cake, Flight of the Navigator.
  • Anime: Ghost in the Shell, Macross Plus, Macross Frontier, The Lion King, RWBY, Your Name, Samurai Champloo.
  • Shows: Band of Brothers, Star Trek TNG, Chicago Fire, The Rookie, Sherlock, John Adams, The Crown, Murdoch Mysteries, Fringe.
  • Games: D&D, Rifts, Mage: The Ascension, Into the Breach, SimCity, Defense Grid 2, Ticket to Ride, Bejeweled 3.
  • Books: Hard to pin down. The last decent one I read was Sisters by Choice by Susan Mallery, but through the years I’ve loved Lord of the Rings, Gundam, Robotech, Hardy Boys, and Eric Wilson’s works.

Constellations

  • Stature: 5′7″, 145 lbs, lean build with a slight beer belly.
  • Health Quirks: A mostly dysfunctional right eye (since ’94); infertile yet fully functional. Testosterone therapy since age 17 for Klinefelter Syndrome.
  • Heritage: Chinese roots with a patchy connection to the language – fluent in English, basic in Cantonese, and Hakka remains a spoon drowning in durian pudding.
  • Astrological Signs: Capricorn Sun, Leo Moon; Earth Horse in the Chinese zodiac.
  • Ink & Metal: Forearm tattoo, double ear piercings, glasses, bald by choice.
  • Creative Outlet: Visual Custodian, writer, designer, visionary.
  • Voice: Oftentimes, I have been told, I have the voice of a late-night DJ - soothing, grounding.
  • Companion: Rudi—gone but never forgotten. My old pal, my bat rat seal, my bat bear, my sneaky humperdoodle. Papa misses you every day, even if I still walk with you every night beneath the twilight sky.
  • Writer’s Badge: Former Top Writer on Quora (2018, Relationships).
  • Advisor: Known for blunt honesty—direct when it needs to be, measured when the moment calls for care. Not always easy to hear, but always the truth.
  • Accidental Traveler: Journeys dictated by whims, not itineraries. Germany, USA, Canada, China, and scattered Caribbean shores.
  • Sport: Two bikes - an Ironhorse 02 (trails) and a Trek Equinox 5 Time-Trial (road), with nearly 32,000 km between them. You’ll often catch me along Granville or Railway Avenue; I favour the Railway paths for their flow and ease over the bumpy roads. I also lift weights at home, but nothing serious — just enough to keep the dumpling firm. I don’t have a god's body, but I do have the body of a very committed snack.
  • Humour: Dry and horny — like a martini with a hidden agenda. Think Jimmy Onishi sniffing horrors in Batsu Games, or the King of Swamp Castle raving about "huge tracts of land". My punchlines wear suits, but my thoughts sometimes forget their trousers.